pieces of my heart…

Whew! You bet…it’s really not that easy… As a nurse, you have to go through series of reviews and examinations before you finally get what you want.

Here’s my story….

Last May 12, 2008 at around 9:20 am, Noy and I board the PAL last flight to manila. We arrived at the NAIA around 10:45 pm.. We got our baggage and went outside the airport hoping to get a cab, but to no avail, many passengers were ahead of us. Noy decided that we go up to the departure area and try our luck there. After 30 mins of standing, finally we got one. At around 11:45, we arrived at my brother’s place in cubao… a little chit chat and updatings, then we finally dozed the night off.

May 13, my brother offered to bring me to Baclaran Church, which I delightfully said “YES”…With the examination in mind, all I wanted to do at that very moment is to be in a quiet moment with God. Took the MRT, walked the long stretch of the busy Baclaran Street, then finally the arrived at the solemn house of God. Prayed the last of my 9-day novena, lighted a candle at the Mother of Perpetual Help and at that very moment, I felt the assuring love of God…Had lunch and off we go to makati to have an ocular visit to the testing center. An uncle of mine advised me to visit the center the day prior to the exam so as to be familiarize with the routes to take in going there lessen the anxiety on the examination day. We had a difficult time locating the testing center… my feet were now sore at this time… A glimpse of the RCBC tower was like seeing the guiding star that led the 3 kings to Jesus’ manger…hehehe… Alongside the RCBC there laid the TRIDENT tower… A mixture of exhaustion and relief came into my tired body… I suggested that we had dinner before going to our hotel… Slept early…. Woke up at 2 am and can’t go back to sleep…Grrrr… I’ll be taking the NCLEX in a few hours and I needed to rest!!!… My anxiety level at that time was to max!.. When my phone alarmed at around 6 am, I started to prepare….

May 14, arrived at the testing center just in time for registration.. While waiting for my turn to register, I met nurses from different parts of the country. All were anxious… we took the elevator, greeted by the personnel then given a paper with instructions to read…one by one our numbers were called. We were asked to sign on a digital pad and register our index fingerprint, a picture was taken, after the registration, we were then escorted to our respective lockers… test takers were given time to use the restroom. Another personnel gave a short instruction and another fingerprinting before entering the testing room… I took the exam for 5 hours… imagine that? 265 questions… no breaks! The computer really tested the nurse in me… I felt hopeless upon reaching item no 150… I was thinking that maybe the computer had a hard time determining my capabilities or maybe I was inconsistent with my answers that why the computer keeps on popping questions…All of these thought kept on running inside my head until item 265!!!… I left the testing center literally floating! I wanted to cry but had no energy to do so…then I realized I was hungry… really, really hungry… Had a late lunch at glorietta and head back to cubao. Depression started to eat me up, I just wanted sleep and keep my mind off the exam…

Waking up the following day was the hardest thing to do… Anxiety didn’t left me. For the first time in my life, I was not interested to go to malls and a restaurant… same thing goes the day after… Friday night came… the much awaited moment.. I opened my account in pearsonvue…click! It prompted…”your exam result is now available”… I started to cry, my heart was racing fast, hands were shaking! But I had to face it!.Click! Drumroll pleaseeee……. Grade: Pass!!!!…. Thank God!!! ..the long walks to Baclaran and the struggle to locate the testing with sore feet… It was all worth it!!!